Submitted by Suze Unger
A penny saved is a government oversight.
The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time, but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.
If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.
When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra.
First you forget names, then you forget faces. Then you forget to pull up your zipper. It's worse when you forget to pull it down.
Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today, it's called golf
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